Another new month, another new opportunity to live life on fire! I’m so grateful for the chance to see another year coming to an end with the hope of a new chapter on the horizon. The last half of this year, the last quarter in particular, has been highly transformative, intuitive, and healing for my soul. I’ve taken the challenges of the year and turned them into gold, and I wouldn’t have been able to do ANY of it without the love and support of a tribe full of people living with intention.
I really feel myself opening up to the possibilities that are positive for my growth and that serve my highest self. The more I started treating myself with love and care, the more love and care I started to receive. I started with meditation and journaling everyday. Everyday, I’m setting the intention to take care of my mind as the first task of the day. I’m showing myself, telling my brain how to stay grounded and centered, even in times of distress or uncertainty. I’m giving myself time to rally heal my mind and cultivate greatness within me. In a way, I’m glad it took me almost breaking down to spark this love inside me, because I know there’s NO turning back. I see why I went through some of the trauma I’ve experienced. It’s so I can choose wellness and choose to love myself like never before. It’s so I can continue to forge this path of healing and growth for myself and for others.
I wouldn’t wish any of what I went through on anyone. I almost died. Not only was I close to death, but I was at the mercy of someone who was supposed to love me. My mind was warped and manipulated, and I was entangled in my relationship emotionally, financially, and mentally in an unhealthy way. I was almost drained of all my strength. I was almost broken. But I cried out for help, and God saved me from that place. I had several out of body experiences where I was literally lifted out of my mess so I could see it from the outside. I knew I needed to get out of the house and the situation I was in. I was suffocating, figuratively and literally. I almost lost it all. But there was and still is a burning ember of light inside me. It’s much larger now, but 10 months ago, it was just a spark. There is no darkness that can overcome that fire. A match lit in a dark cave can still light the way out.
The flame is the love that has been inside all along, waiting to grow larger at the right time. I decided to choose light over darkness, strength over weakness. I chose to put myself in the right environment for my light to grow. I chose wellness and self love when it was the hardest thing to do. Sometimes the hardest thing is the ONLY thing. The hardest challenge you face is where the biggest reward comes from.
It was hard to let go of a 2 year relationship. It still feels like grief and loss, even though it was toxic. There’s still a part of me that I had to let go of to be able to embrace a new and brighter life. But without the right environment, it is nearly impossible for a life to flourish and grow in its most pure and most honest nature. Without the proper tools for self awareness, self care, grounding, cleansing, letting go, etc., there is no way I could have made it to this point. It’s so easy to take life for granted, and I’m still working on increasing my gratitude. But I’m on a path of growth and I’m happy to have support.
I’ve made a commitment to myself to fan my own flame, everyday. I am dedicated to being bright AF on purpose. I am no longer shrinking my heart’s desires nor hiding my light. My purpose is to take my experiences, use my intuition and creativity, and expand my life so it can reach and touch others too. I am not alone, and neither are you. I have a mission to turn pain into promise, to make beauty of of the unexplained, to heal, to grow, and to ignite. I’m thankful for the light.